Sensitivity and the Ascension Path – The ups, the downs, the waves! You’re not alone!
You may know of my long unhealthy journey with my body and you may not. If not, below is a super short summary as it’s important you do know for what I have to share with you today.
In a nutshell and like many women, I loathed my body, I shamed her, malnourished her, beat her up, feasted on food binges followed by deprivation and over-exercising. Drank lots of alcohol to shut her down and within the last year of this period, I engaged in a very committed year long relationship with drugs. It was a very very very dark period of my life that went on for several years.
That commitment died quickly after I (literally) picked myself up off the floor several times at a mere 90 something lbs. – having to call the ambulance on myself.
I stayed in the hospital for a little over a week and from then on, I made a pact with myself (or a few):
I swore I’d get healthy
I’d never do another drug again
I’d gain weight
I’d love myself
But it didn’t end there! Those pacts took a lot of work and many health complications along the way.
Here we are 17 years later and I’ve been reflecting a lot on that day. It was a cold day in January of 2001 when I woke up not just physically but spiritually. What felt like a day from hell caused the biggest breakthrough of my life. In fact, it saved my life.
This was when my true spiritual path began. Not that long ago, I used to think my spiritual awakening started in 2010 when my father passed and a couple months later found myself on my couch bawling with a clear knowing that I was not living my life’s purpose and that I had to go seek it. I now call this experience my “2nd” awakening. This was a moment so profound accompanied with a very clear guided message from spirit that I could not ignore and I didn’t!
That message would have never been able to come through if I didn’t clean up my physical body first. If I didn’t have that first wake-up call that cold day in January that led me on another (approx) 9 year journey of healing my physical body from her many food sensitivities, digestive issues, nerve damage, weight fluctuations coupled with anxiety, depression and the list goes on!
Let me first say that we are all technically on a spiritual journey from the day we are born, just in human form. However at some point for many of us, we “lose” our connection to spirit (or so we believe) and for some of us, we eventually “wake up” to the path of finding ourselves again. This path is not always an easy one. This is where we are called to let many aspects of ourselves fall away that are not serving us as a way to navigate back to our truth.
More than ever, right now, this is why we are all here, so we can heal the collective human heart one person at a time!
You may have incurred that day (or a few) where you “woke up” and started questioning your existence and who you are to be in the world that then catapulted you into a portal of healing, remembering, healing, remembering, healing, remembering and so on!!
Within this, you are being “forced” to be with you, your body and in turn, you often want to “leave” your body, find that vice again, yet there is that “higher” more conscious voice inside that says, “no” and sometimes you listen and sometimes you don’t.
Self-love and compassion is needed in those moments because your ego is too busy berating you with messages like, “you did it again, you’re worthless, no good and you should know better!” And the saga continues and continues!
We often think the spiritual journey or “Ascension” is about just ascending “up there” somewhere. Getting to a particular place within the spirit realm! It’s not!! It’s the opposite!
Think of the metaphor of my Body’s journey where I was always trying to get “up there” somewhere “out of my body”… until my body came screaming for me to come back home, down and in. It wasn’t until I came back down and in that I could hear spirit’s deeper calling and in turn my own truth!
We cannot reach this place we long for during our ascension process until we descend INTO the underworld of the body.
We must DESCEND in order to ASCEND!
Note that I am speaking a lot of my physical body here yet this relates to everything – the emotional body as well, as the emotional body will affect the physical body on all levels. We need to look at it all!
You may have heard many speaking of this path of ascension or maybe you yourself have known for some time that you’re on it. Maybe not? Maybe you’re just entering into the awareness of this but it resonates with you!
Either way, tap into your body. What has your body been telling you, what is your body needing and are you listening?
When I ask you this question, I am wanting you to feel into not just your physical body but your emotional, mental and spiritual body as well!
Why this is so important?
Because with ascension, from my understanding both with personal experience and through my trainings, is that this path is a journey towards wholeness and oneness, creating a unity consciousness so that we no longer live in fear and separation. For this to take place, there is a shedding that needs to happen of our ego. It’s not about “ridding” of the ego but it’s understanding your ego and how to manage it. It’s befriending the ego and not giving into it during those times of fear. We can choose fear or love and it’s when we can face our fear with love and compassion that we are in our wholeness. Its feeling your emotions and managing them with ease, love, compassion and grace, even the painful ones. It’s feeling the sensations in your body and learning from them, even the pain….”especially the pain!” It’s walking the earth embodying love and kindness yet to achieve that, one must love themselves first – unconditionally. We are all on a radical journey towards self-love right now. It’s the one thing that could potentially catapult our humanity into a more peaceful and blissful existence.
Again, we must descend to ASCEND!
The ascension process can feel painful due to the many waves of emotions you might be experiencing yet those emotions are guiding forces to your growth and evolution on your journey back to you. In turn, if you are being called, to then share your experiences with others as a light worker, healer and guide yet first, you need to take care of you!
Listen to your emotions and be with them for when we don’t – we incur setbacks and more challenges along the way. That is why it is so important to come down and in, to merge heaven and earth into your physical temple and embrace her.
Your body is your soul’s home for this lifetime and once you acknowledge that, you will take care of her as the temple she is. All your body is wanting is for you to partner with her (your body) in this journey of life.
I invite you to surrender and accept her hand! Let me know how this resonates with you by leaving a comment below!
Remember – this journey is not for you to do on your own! If not by me, seek the support you need and love yourself unconditionally along the way!
If you are needing support, I offer in-person and virtual sessions via zoom, Skype or by phone. You can email me at [email protected] to set up a session or start with a free consultation call to see how I can be of support.
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Photo credit: Bill Crisafi @billsafi